Well this holiday season has opened up my eyes on how much my son has changed. Lately he has been showing his un-appreciation for what he has. I know that every child goes through this stage. I just never realized how difficult it is to deal with this stage. Every time we go out to a store he expects to be getting something (and we never buy him something every time we go out) and every time there is a commercial for the newest thing he wants it. But when it comes to picking up his toys and taking care of what he already as he wants nothing to do with it. He has been working on cleaning his room for a week now (and his father has helped and along with me with parts so that it's not as overwhelming for him) but he doesn't care that he has no floor to play on. We have threatened to throw away toys if he's not going to clean. We have even told him that Christmas will not come unless he starts showing that he can be responsible and take care of what he has. But as I type he is still playing around and not cleaning and there is not that much left to clean up.
So I have spent the last couple of days reflecting on what has been brewing in my household. And the light bulb has clicked!!!!! What am I providing as a proper example on how my son should appreciate what he has in life???????? I do appreciate what I have but at the same time I don't and I occasionally what the newest thing that's out whether it is electronics or something for my hobbies. I complain how I can't stand the way something I have isn't working properly or how old it is getting (i.e. my laptop)...................................... When we go out shopping there are times when I will get something for me even when I stand there and tell my child how $$$ is tight and we can't get that new toy he wants. There are days when I just don't feel like cleaning and I walk away from the mess. Even in my relationship I have been showing the un-appreciation of what I have just because it's not exactly what I envisioned a relationship to be like.
So I guess the first place I need to start is working on myself and how I act when it comes to tasks that need to be taken care of. And I need to start showing appreciation for what I have in my life and not complain how I wish I could have something that I cannot afford at the moment. Because if I cannot change these traits in my self how can I expect my 9 year old to change?!?!?!?!?!?!?
So I am starting my New Years resolution list now and on the top is going to be learning how to appreciate what we have because unfortunately there are people out there in this world who are not fortunate enough to have what we have. I will be looking into organizations that will open up my families eyes to what is going on around us as we live in home where we have food and heat and love........ And I will be blogging about our experience and I believe posting this will help me follow through with it.
Hugs
~D~
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Saturday, November 30, 2013
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
The Challenges of Being a Parent
Well I have really dropped the ball on blogging these past few months!!!! The end of our summer was busy with our wedding and honeymoon (which I will post about later). On returning from our honeymoon the 2013-14 school year started a few days later for our son. And to say the least it has not been a great start to the school year.
Mr. J was passed onto the 4th grade even though he did not complete the state mandated summer school which is a requirement for children who do not pass the reading evaluations called the DRA..... We decided that we were not going to send Mr. J to summer school because all the educators at the school wanted to do was pass him on the the next grade because he excelled at math...... who cares that he is only reading at a second grade level, or the fact that he can't even spell common words, and doesn't understand the structures of a simple sentence. So countless phone calls, emails, and notes written to the teacher still have not chipped away at the issue. The school doesn't believe he needs to repeat because there is a possibility that he will never catch up to where he will be on grade level...... and they are not interested in giving him a chance to even try........ The principle told me that if they kept every child that was struggling behind they would have students driving themselves to school..... can you imagine how mortified I was hearing that over the phone.
So it has been determined that I am going to be one of those parents this year that the school and teachers dread dealing with. Because my only concern is my son!!!! Yes I understand that they have many students and there are other children struggling ...... but I will not allow my child to be swept under the rug and passed on because no one wants to deal with it.
I already has one meeting because there were parts of Mr. J's IEP that were not being implemented...... one's that would have prevented notes being sent home about how he's not paying attention, he can't sit still in his seat, or how he had a rough day (no other details but that). And the excuse is "OH we didn't see those when we glanced over his IEP." And shortly I will be having another meeting about his work load and the demands of it...... because no child should be spending 4+ hrs on 2 worksheets especially when the school already knows that there is a learning disability!!!!
So because of all this Mr. J is having a really rough time dealing with it all. We have constant melt downs during homework and a huge change in attitude!!!!! The kid that loved soccer now want's nothing to do with it because he doesn't think that he is good enough....... what 8yr old should be saying or even thinking that. He comes home telling me he is stupid and that he can't do anything. We are acting up in school because he is too overwhelmed and doesn't understand. I have no idea what I can do
It breaks my heart </3
I have never told my child that he is not good enough or that he is dumb..... We encourage him to try even when it looks hard because we know he can do it. But because he is so far behind compared to his classmates to the point he is taking notice........ the confidence that was once there is now gone :( We do our best to build that confidence but everyday it seems like what we had strengthen in his mind is beaten back down to where we picked the pieces up.
So life has been busy with Mr. J which has put a hault to everything else.... fingers crossed that this whole situation gets fixed and things start smoothing out for him.....
HUGS
XXX
~D~
Mr. J was passed onto the 4th grade even though he did not complete the state mandated summer school which is a requirement for children who do not pass the reading evaluations called the DRA..... We decided that we were not going to send Mr. J to summer school because all the educators at the school wanted to do was pass him on the the next grade because he excelled at math...... who cares that he is only reading at a second grade level, or the fact that he can't even spell common words, and doesn't understand the structures of a simple sentence. So countless phone calls, emails, and notes written to the teacher still have not chipped away at the issue. The school doesn't believe he needs to repeat because there is a possibility that he will never catch up to where he will be on grade level...... and they are not interested in giving him a chance to even try........ The principle told me that if they kept every child that was struggling behind they would have students driving themselves to school..... can you imagine how mortified I was hearing that over the phone.
So it has been determined that I am going to be one of those parents this year that the school and teachers dread dealing with. Because my only concern is my son!!!! Yes I understand that they have many students and there are other children struggling ...... but I will not allow my child to be swept under the rug and passed on because no one wants to deal with it.
I already has one meeting because there were parts of Mr. J's IEP that were not being implemented...... one's that would have prevented notes being sent home about how he's not paying attention, he can't sit still in his seat, or how he had a rough day (no other details but that). And the excuse is "OH we didn't see those when we glanced over his IEP." And shortly I will be having another meeting about his work load and the demands of it...... because no child should be spending 4+ hrs on 2 worksheets especially when the school already knows that there is a learning disability!!!!
So because of all this Mr. J is having a really rough time dealing with it all. We have constant melt downs during homework and a huge change in attitude!!!!! The kid that loved soccer now want's nothing to do with it because he doesn't think that he is good enough....... what 8yr old should be saying or even thinking that. He comes home telling me he is stupid and that he can't do anything. We are acting up in school because he is too overwhelmed and doesn't understand. I have no idea what I can do
It breaks my heart </3
I have never told my child that he is not good enough or that he is dumb..... We encourage him to try even when it looks hard because we know he can do it. But because he is so far behind compared to his classmates to the point he is taking notice........ the confidence that was once there is now gone :( We do our best to build that confidence but everyday it seems like what we had strengthen in his mind is beaten back down to where we picked the pieces up.
So life has been busy with Mr. J which has put a hault to everything else.... fingers crossed that this whole situation gets fixed and things start smoothing out for him.....
HUGS
XXX
~D~
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